Tuesday, June 14, 2011

A rough day

June 12
Mom and Dad,
Well it’s Sunday night. Today and a little of yesterday has been a roller coaster of emotion for me. Saturday was good, I was just super tired and then today I was burned out. I was so tired and we had so much time off studying that I was burned out and in a way bad mood. I kept it inside and didn’t express it to anyone but just so sick of all the rules. There are so many rules here. I can see a reason for all of them but just so sick of them. Like no gum, or music, or we have to stay in our classroom, I can see why they have them because missionaries in the past have ruined it for all of us. But then in an interview today with our branch president, I asked how could I feel the spirit more because I’m doing everything, studying hard, being obedient. But I thought I wasn’t feeling it a lot, and he said that it’s not always the warm and fuzzy feeling. It still guides us to do things that we may not even notice the effect it could have, but people are watching you so that was good. Then at the devotional tonight the administrative director of the MTC spoke and I just had a total change of heart of why I’m here and that it’s not my time, it’s his. After the devotional we watched the movie “Legacy” and oh man the elders in here are deprived they went crazy when anyone would kiss. I hope I don’t ever get that desperate! But during the movie I had the spirit touch my heart and I just felt such a love for you guys. I don’t miss you guys. I mean don’t get the wrong idea here, but I sincerely and truly deeply love you guys! Thank you for everything that you have done and will do for me. One of the parents died in the movie and I thought of you guys and a tear may or may not have come to my eye. I love you guys and want you to know that. Today was rough but things are “muy bien” now. Life is good. I’m in the Lords errand now and not my own. The spirit is so strong here and works in weird ways. I leave here in 16 days and I’m kind of way excited to leave. Love you guys and will write some more.
Elder Call

P.S. I broke the rules to writ this J

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